Helping Someone with Bipolar Disorder or Addiction

This question comes up over and over again. What can we do to help someone, especially when they don't want it. Often times people with bipolar disorder are like those in the grips of a serious addiction and fail to see the trail of disaster they can cause around them, and most of the time, they think you are the one with the problem, not them.

Having been in both positions before; addiction, mania, and the recieving end, I have run up against many different problems like these. Solutions are hard to find. In fact, each situation really requires its own custom tailored solution. Trust me, there is no magic pill. So how can we help these loved ones?

Education about the problem is the most reliable weapon in the fight. Luckily there is lots of help in this arena. Finding someone who knows how to handle the situation is ultimitely the best, however those people are very difficult to find. A good start is AA meetings and bipolar support groups. You can find thousands of these people on line as well in support groups. These people have been there...

If you can't find someone, then you will have to educate yourself, which you should do even if you have help. Good places to start are The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA - http://www.dbsalliance.org/) and the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI - http://www.nami.org/) and the National Institutes on Mental Health (NIMH - http://www.nimh.nih.gov/). I get tons of information from these sites that I refer people to to get help. Another site to help understand medications is Crazy Meds (http://www.crazymeds.us/). All of these are great reliable sources of information.

Here are some good things to keep in mind:

1) If the person is in the grips of an attack and you can get them to converse with you, talk to the person normally. Sending the wrong signal like anger, or preachiness can be very counterproductive.

2) Do not think this person is crazy. Remember that they don't really realize what they are doing. In fact they believe they are in the right. It's just sometimes they just don't see beyond themselves.

3) Do not encourage their grandious thoughts. Even though they have great ideas at the time, they will really have a hard time getting any of it accomplished until they come down. Encouraging someone can feed the fire rather than try to talk reason with it.

4) If you are unable to help, get someone who can. Either a friend, fellow addict or bipolar, or if necessary, even 911.

5) Do not take the threat of suicide lightly, and you must let that person know that you will not either. Even though some may use it as a weapon, most who say it, are perfectly capable of it, believe me.

6) Go find someone with the exact condition, but stable, that can help you understand. If you've never experienced this situation before, then you never will fully understand. Don't hesitate to ask. Most people are more than willing to help. In fact in my AA program, we must, it's a valuable tool to helping ourselves. Make sure that the person you enlist is stable though, or you may end up with double trouble.

If you still can't help yourself, then by all means contact me. I'll do what i can to help.

peace.